Things I Hate About Christmas

 Today is the day of The Bah Humbug Blahgfest over at Grumpy Bulldog's blog. You just have to answer one question:


What are the 12 things I hate most about the holiday season?

Now there are things that I do actually like about Christmas - watching someones reaction when they open a present, fairy lights to name a couple. But there are some things that drive me up the wall.


So in no particular order here is my list:

• The population seems to triple overnight. There are people everywhere. Where are these people for the rest of the year? Do they not shop or go out any other time than December? And they have no sense. They will suddenly stop dead in your path. They will stop to talk to people they happen to meet seemingly oblivious to the fact that they are blocking the way for other people.

• I like Christmas decorations and I understand why local councils put their external decorations up in the town centre in November. But that does not explain why people have to decorate their homes in November. You can go crazy with your Christmas decorations once December rolls around but not before. 

• Because of the aforementioned population increase around this time of year all public transport seems to either run ridiculously late or just grind to a halt because of the weather. It was because of having to wait forty minutes for a bus that was supposed to run every ten minutes, and then being crammed on like sardines last year that I now walk home from work. 

•  In the UK snow is not always guaranteed at this time of year. We moan if we don't get snow. But if we do get snow the country grinds to a halt. There are other countries that have snow constantly and they manage to carry on as usual but two flakes in the UK and we can't cope. (I do like snow though just not how we cope with it)

•  When you can actually fight your way in to a shop through the crowds the shelves are fairly empty. Not quite January-sales-been-hit-by-a-plague-of-locusts empty but still fairly empty. It's ridiculous really - any other time of year the latest DVD release or game or whatever would sell but not like at Christmas when it seems to become life or death.

• Now this might be just my family but when we all gather together there seems to be a certain tension threatening to break through. It isn't helped by what we refer to as The Christmas Day Massacre when my mum and my Uncle clashed and we spent the most painfully tense thirty minutes I have ever experienced before we made our excuses and went home.

• If you decide against fighting your way in to shops and go for the 'easy' option of online shopping you then have to shop weeks in advance or risk your shopping getting delayed or lost in the post. (OK so I haven't had the best luck with the postal service throughout this year but it always seems to be worse at Christmas)

• It doesn't seem to matter how much rubbish you eat or awful it makes you feel you still eat more. There must be a switch in our heads that is flicked at this time of year that makes us unable to stop eating. "I couldn't eat another thing. I feel sick." "Do you want a mince pie?" "OK then." *ten minutes later* "OK now I am going to be sick." We'll never learn...

• Every surface in your house is covered in Christmas cards. You go to get something off the mantel piece and knock half a dozen cards off (although the same can be said of birthday cards).

• Carol singers - now I'm not talking about the sort of carol singers who can actually sing, who like to sing. The ones that stand in public places, in groups, collecting money for good causes. No not those ones. I'm talking about the ones who bother you at your home, who can't sing to save their lives, and are only doing it in the hope that you'll give them some money to go away.

• Secret Santa - I can't stand it. Christmas is stressful enough trying to think up gifts for your friends and family without some bright spark at work thinking it will be 'fun' to do Secret Santa. Trying to wrack your brains to think of something to buy for someone you don't know all that well. And it's only when you take part in something like this that you realise how little you know about some people.

• And last but far from least we come to The Pogues and the Christmas song Fairytale of New York. AARGH!!! I know I'm going to get people disagreeing with me on here, saying that it's the greatest thing since sliced bread but I can't stand the song. And to be honest I probably wouldn't care about it if it didn't get voted the greatest Christmas song ever every single year. Yes the reason I hate this song is because of all of you out there who insist on it being brilliant. You've given it too much exposure. Personally I find it depressing. Some people say it shows that there are two sides to Christmas. That it isn't always a happy occasion. That is true but does it mean we all have to be miserable? (I do realise that it is a bit ironic me saying that when this is an anti Christmas blogfest). I'm sure New York is a great place but you wouldn't have thought so hearing this song.

Right now I've got all that off my chest (can you tell which thing about Christmas I hate the most?) I will go and listen to my favourite Christmas song (Merry Christmas Everyone by Shakin Stevens) and continue counting down to Christmas with my advent calendar (yes I am 26 and still get an advent calendar)